I make these now.
Sunday, June 10, 2012
(This started out as a fun little free writing exercise, but turned into a much more serious essay than I was anticipating. I haven't done much editing to it, so please be forgiving of any typos)
I just want to write a paragraph that I can look at and say “There, There is a piece of work that I am proud of.” I wish it could just appear on the page. It would be full of deep, well put together thoughts that flowed like sweet honey. I want to be a good writer. I feel that when I’m thinking about becoming a good writer that I get too overworked about writing something good, instead of actually caring what I’m writing about. I want to have an amazing finished product but the topic doesn’t concern me. Interestingly enough, when I think of being a business owner I don’t really care what it is that I want to do, I just want to own and run a successful business. This kind of worries me a little. I think I love the idea of being a business owner/good writer more than what it is I would do as a business owner or the topics I would write about. Could it be that I need a more clear goals or desires? Am I holding myself back by being too broad in my goals? Is that why I haven’t become a good writer, because I don’t have a passion for which I would be writing? I think I may have stumbled upon something here. How can I ever get some place without having a clear direction as to what I’m going to do? I think this could also be applied to my fitness goals as well. I’d like to be in shape. I know what I need to do to get there. I just haven’t been willing to be honest with myself about what I want and then be willing to focus in and drive to it with all I’ve got until I reach my goal. I’ll never get a 6-pack eating sugar or fast food. I know this in my mind, so why don’t I do anything about it. I know I’ll never become a millionaire working for Sage, so why am I not doing anything to move me past them. I know I’ll never become a great writer if I never write, but what do I have enough passion about to push me to write frequently enough to become a better writer?
I know that we get exactly what it is that we want out of life. If someone really wants something, then they do something about it and do what it takes to get it. I’m afraid that the reality is that I value being lazy and sitting down to watch tv more than I do being a good writer, having a 6-pack, or coming up with and executing a business plan. Many people are in this position where they have goals and desires for what they want out of life, but they aren’t realizing them. Why is that? I think if there were an easy answer then everyone would be ripped millionaires, but instead we are a people who are overweight and struggling financially.
I am where I am because of the choices I have made. My gut is a dead giveaway that I have a habit of eating more calories than I burn. My modest savings and debts that I have show that I have desired to spend my money on things other than paying off debt or saving it. The fact that I haven’t written on my blog or elsewhere for the past year shows that I don’t care enough about writing to take the time to write. The common phrase we’ve all heard before goes something like this “Sow a thought, reap an action. Sow an action, reap a habit. Sow a habit, reap a character. Sow a character, reap a destiny.” I believe this statement to be true. I know that if I am to change my destiny, I need to start at the beginning with my thoughts. If my thoughts are constantly on the things I want, then I will act on them and start building my way to reaching my goals.
This last week I work Mon-Sat and put in 68 hours. That doesn’t leave much time for much else. I would wake up early to have scripture study with Emily, go to work, come home usually after 10pm, chat with Emily for a short bit and then go to bed. While most of our lives aren’t always that busy, it seems like there is usually something going on that fills up our days and makes it easy to forget the big picture items in our lives. When life is busy it’s easy to justify eating fast food for dinner. I mean, you can pig out in one meal and not see a noticeable difference the next day, right? Or spend $10 to go see a movie and it won’t destroy your long term savings goals. But it’s these casual lack of vision moments (or days, months, or even years) that we fall into that over time that keep us from progressing and achieving the things we really desire in life.
So how do we fix this? Gosh, if I knew I’d probably already be doing it. This started out as just a little free write exercise and turned into an hour of typing and thought exploring. As I’ve looked over what I’ve written it seems like what I need to do is constantly be reminding myself of the bigger picture and keeping those goals in mind. By doing that it will be a reminder to make the better choices every day that will help me reach those long term goals. How will I do this? I think a good start will be to first figure out specific goals that I want to reach, like weight and body fat percentage; figure out exactly what the first business is that I want to start, and a detailed budget that will get me to where I want to be financially. After I have these things figured out I need to come up with ways of reminding myself of them multiple times a day. I have a white board in my room I can write them on and use to remind me of my goals while I’m here at home and I can probably put up a note of some sort in my car and work truck to help me keep them in mind when I’m out and about. Having them in mind throughout the day will help me make smarter purchases, remind me to go to the gym, and to take time to write a little on a more consistent basis. I know that by doing these small steps I will be able to achieve my larger goals over time.
While I realize that there are many things in this life that we can’t get no matter how hard we want them, more things are under our control than I think we realize. Let’s focus on the things that we can control and not fall victim to complacency, laziness, or the fear of failing. Satisfaction and happiness are waiting for all those who diligently pursue a worthwhile goal. After all, “Men are that they might have joy”… and a killer 6-pack.
Friday, August 6, 2010
Friday, March 26, 2010
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
i feel bad that i haven't been updating this blog more. i wish i could say that i have just been way too busy with life and i just haven't had the time to sit down and right something down. the truth of the matter is simply that i've been lazy. lazy in not blogging and lazy in, well, not going to the gym. :( it's tragic, i know. so the real reason that i haven't been righting posts is that i've been ashamed that i haven't made it to the gym the past couple of weeks and i don't like looking like a lazy bum who says he's going to do something and then doesn't follow through. but the whole reason i made this blog was to help motivate me because i know that if i'm committing myself to all you who read this then i'll be more likely to follow though with it. i guess in the beginning i thought i was just going to do awesome and have nothing embarrassing to post along the way. but, i see now that the only way this is going to make me want to get out and work more is if you guys are aware of my successes AND short comings. i have to feel threatened by you guys finding out my lazy side so that i'll get out there more and keep working out. so now i'm letting you all know, i, mark acor, have not been to the gym in just over two weeks. i've only lost about one pound in that entire time and i've had two, yes two, sodas since i've said that i was going to quit drinking soda. so there, there are my dirty little secrets. i hope you're all happy. now i have been humbled and i'm off to the gym. hopefully i'll have some good things to tell you next time.